WARNINGS: Explicit sex
Through a fusion of HEART and VOID, Roxy appearifies out of actually nowhere. His appearance is familiar and different.
ROXY: didja miss me???
He checks his wrist and uses his powers to make a watch appear on it.
ROXY: hOLy carp thats a long time!
ROXY: well it looks like i accidentally did not exist for like 2000 years
ROXY: i miss anything?
DIRK: Roxy...It is you.
DIRK: I’ve been looking for you.
ROXY: srry buster! that mustve sucked considering i literally wasnt anywhere
DIRK: It did suck. Your hide and seek game goes crazy.
ROXY: its not that i was tryin to hideee or anything
ROXY: im just doin what were all doin and tryin to figure out constructive ways to pass the time at our distant points in the universe now that were in our thousands
ROXY: i rly do think theres somethin to old age i myself am enjoyin it
ROXY: when you have eternity in front of u it rly reshapes your conception of meaning and pushes you to explore it in new ways
DIRK: You find literally not existing to be constructive, enjoyable and meaningful?
ROXY: WELL *U* wouldnt get it
ROXY: ur only happy with all eyes on u
ROXY: and thats great n all, the universe needs its anchor points so that all the chaotic entropic mess gets pulled in a particular direction rather than needlessly spread apart
ROXY: what im sayin is ppl bond over how lame u are. U rly bring ppl together
ROXY: but my thing rn is finding purpose in the quiet. if nobodys talkin or thinkin about me then ig i stop existin, but that probably just means that the concept of roxy doesnt bring anything new to the table at that moment
ROXY: and thats ok because maybe at some point, in a drastically different context, roxy will hold some new meaning or synthesize with the features of that context to create something entirely unique
ROXY: something that helps push the greater treasury of ideas forward–and ill come back!
ROXY: like right now with u thinkin of me! hey... YOU did void! maybe u DO get it!
ROXY: AAA im talkin a mile a minute here this is what happens when u dont exist for 2000 years!!!! ZOOMIES!!!!!
DIRK: That’s okay. I called you specifically so that I could hear you talk again.
ROXY: pfft no you did not u are not the sentimental type dirk
ROXY: you need somethin and im guessing it has to do with the...unusual getup
DIRK: You see right through me as always. That’s part of what I missed so much about you.
Dirk pulls off his veil. Roxy magnetizes to the inside of his personal bubble, poking, pinching and prodding worriedly at Dirk’s abnormalities.
ROXY: !!!
ROXY: oh my gawd dirk what happened to ur body? when did this happen 2 u??
DIRK: Cosmetic gender affirming surgery isn’t meant to keep for thousands of years. It’s been a slow drip of deterioration.
ROXY: yea but its not like u to let it get out of hand like this
ROXY: i watched u maintain yourself for centuries with all of the control freaky precision of an inhumanly vain robot building guy
ROXY: how did u let it get to this point?? :((
DIRK: I guess I...
DIRK: Lost myself, for a time.
ROXY: but ur ego is so BIG
ROXY: its supposed to protect you from things like this!!
DIRK: It’s been hard since we were banished from the planet we created, Roxy. You know I’ve always been a tactile person, and that the physical, grounded world holds lots of meaning to me. There was a time that we stood on the ground, had our homes there, my workshop, my tools. And while I *am* trying to acclimate to this new phase of being where we float around untethered to any particular places or things while getting really, really fucking old, it is...an adjustment.
ROXY: poor baby
ROXY: i understand
ROXY: its scary living forever v_v
ROXY: did you summon me bc you needed someone to talk 2...?
DIRK: I need you to perform a reprise.
ROXY: okaaaay...?
DIRK: The decay of the inorganic parts of my body has gotten so out of hand that not even I could put myself back together at this point. Only you can fix me now, using your powers.
ROXY: IS THIS ABOUT THE TEEN SURGERY THING/?
ROXY: dirk
ROXY: when we first got to a version of earth with u know doctors and hospitals and such
ROXY: WHERE did i place on your mental hierarchy of viable medical options exactly
DIRK: I don’t see why that matters now.
DIRK: And it’s not like regular doctors had the tools to address our god tiered bodies anyways, considering my needs especially.
ROXY: tell me dirk
DIRK: Me, Sawtooth, you, real doctors.
ROXY: ok good to know
ROXY: well let me just put on my rubber gloves and straighten my medical license that i dont have and lets get started
DIRK: Come on. You know you’re the only one who can do it.
ROXY: bahaha
ROXY: bc im the only one who knows ur trans right
ROXY: still. after 5000 years
ROXY: i guess i DO rly know how to keep a secret
DIRK: It’s not that I’m keeping it a "secret" from everyone. It’s just that I’ve never had a reason to bring it up.
ROXY: in 5000 years
DIRK: And nobody’s ever asked.
ROXY: for 5000 years
DIRK: Guess we’re just surrounded by some fundamentally incurious motherfuckers.
ROXY: MHM RIGHT
ROXY: i have a curiousquestion dirk
ROXY: do u even consider urself trans
DIRK: What reason do I have to?
ROXY: i can think of a few??????? ??????????? ?????
ROXY: its not that u have to its just that u check all the boxes that put the option on the table
ROXY: and not once have i seen you even feign interest in it
DIRK: This is about me being "transgender and transphobic" again, isn’t it.
ROXY: wwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwweeeeeeeellllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllyesitis
DIRK: I thought we had gone through this all before. You superseded me as Strilonde family patriarch and replaced all of the traditional markers of masculinity with pretty much whatever the hell you wanted at any given moment.
DIRK: And we all obviously respected you for that, because it was awesome and original just like you.
DIRK: But even though you had changed my mind on certain things, unlike other members of the family my mode of self expression stayed the same, which in some way communicated that I still believed in the old shit.
DIRK: And you think in some poetic way me becoming the Elephant Man is my penance for that.
ROXY: oh Lawrd
ROXY: you always act like i dont wanna hear ur genderthots bc you have a bionic penis and that somehow makes you a boring traditionalist
ROXY: but having a selfmade bionic penis is obvs NOT boring
ROXY: and your experience with transgenderism is rly unique! like ONCE IN A LIFETIME unique. i mean u did kinda introduce me to the concept!
ROXY: i always just wanted to talk to you about it but you dodge the subject like a fuckin ninja and on some level thats why we stopped relating to each other
DIRK: First of all, is "transgenderism" really an okay thing to say.
ROXY: my gawd you do act like a cis.....
DIRK: And obviously I had thoughts about this secret thing I was keeping to myself and maintaining through thousands of plastic surgery procedures over the years. Thoughts I kept in my head. A man, in the Dirk sense of the word, is an effortless embodiment of perfection. Secrecy was part of the conceit.
DIRK: But you knew how much effort I was actually putting into it and that embarrassed me. In a way your knowing alone was the last thing keeping me trans.
ROXY: well u R the one who told me!
DIRK: I know.
DIRK: Maybe I entrusted that part of myself to you because I knew in your hands it would never fully be lost.
Roxy smiles warmly at Dirk. He carves a door out of the black of space and opens it. It leads into a white room.
THE OPERATING ROOM
Dirk lies on a slab in a windowless white operating room. His form is well lit-fully naked, besides his glasses. The left half of his body is entirely covered in fleshy bulbs. A tapestry of too loose and too tight skin spirals around his right leg. His upper right side remains unblemished. Roxy has changed into a unique surgeon’s outfit for the occasion.
Roxy pulls up a metallic stool and sits close to Dirk. He takes off his glove and carefully assesses where to begin. Hovering his hand over the uneven silhouette, he zeroes in on where the body is intact, still sculpted to Dirk’s standards. He moves his finger along the crease of an invisible line running down Dirk’s chest to his lower abs.
ROXY (thinking): dirk has almost imperceptible seams all over his body
ROXY (thinking): there is nothing inhuman about the way hes constructed himself...when you looked at him youd never guess there was anything unnatural at play
ROXY (thinking): he used to keep these chilled closets of neatly folded skin, alchemized copies of his own, yards and yards of it
ROXY (thinking): i probably wasnt the only one who knew they were there, but i was the only one who knew what they were for
ROXY (thinking): no, ‘unnatural’ isn’t the right word for it
ROXY (thinking): hes hypernatural. possessing so inborn a beauty only synthetics can produce.
ROXY (thinking): besides using just my memory ill have to go by the parts of him that are still intact to recover the rest
Roxy stops his fingertip right above the groin–where the invisible seams go away and a gradient of deformities starts to appear.
Having studied Dirk’s right side thoroughly, Roxy returns to the bumpy topology. He firmly grips a large lump and voids it away. It leaves no blood or perforations behind, just the smaller lumps underneath giving the impression it was never there to begin with. He continues on this way, digging his hands into Dirk’s upper left side and voiding away the masses. He handles Dirk’s loose meat with the roughness of a butcher but becomes very careful and precise the moment before voiding a piece of him away.
DIRK: You really wanna hear my thoughts on being transgender.
ROXY: YAS
DIRK: *Mine* of all people’s?
ROXY: yesipoo!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
DIRK: You’re not gonna like what I have to say.
ROXY: sez who
DIRK: You’re gonna dislike it and then you’re going to debunk my gender.
DIRK: And then I’ll be left with no other option but to end my life.
ROXY: -.-"
ROXY: i would never "DEBUNK SOMEONES GENDER" that’s horrible!!!! i’m the gender wizard i love all genders especially the trans ones !!!!!!!!!!THATS INCLUDIN URS BUSTER BROWN
ROXY: and if we have this discussion i can FINALLY cross genderjams w dirk off mah bucket list
ROXY: now sit back relax and open up to the gender wizord B)
DIRK: Sigh. Fine.
DIRK: Here we go.
DIRK: I consider myself a cisgender-identifying transgender man.
ROXY: MMH
DIRK: Go ahead. Ridicule me. I’m waiting.
ROXY: ASDHF
ROXY: IM NOT RIDICULIN
ROXY: UR JUST VERY UNIQUE AND SPARKLY IS ALL AND I WANNA HEAR YOU POV!!! HELP ME UNDERSTAND THIS THANG BOY!!
DIRK: It’s like afab/amab paradigm taken to a way more honest level. I am, by birth, transgender. But I see myself deeply in the concept of being cisgender.
DIRK: Take the word "transition." You start at point A, enter transit, and get off at point B. The experience of being transgender is commonly conceived of as a life in transit. But for me, there is no point A. I was brought into this world as a man and from there only ever made every effort to further immerse myself in maleness. I not only began at point B but have endeavored to exist as deeply in point B as humanly and inhumanly possible.
DIRK: I have reason to believe that if I were born cisgender I’d be the exact same way. Actively modifying my physiology to become the most male version of myself. In fact, I have a separate theory network concerning this concept which I umbrella under the term "horse gender", but if I started explaining that now you quite literally may never get a chance to evacuate your hands off my lumpy fucking body.
ROXY: i think i fuck with you
ROXY: well idk about horse gender idk what that is
ROXY: but i mean the underlying philosophy here that the difference between the you that is born trans and the u that is born cis is not actually the interesting part of the discussion
ROXY: while it may seem counterintuitive to a guy whos constantly holding up the hammer and chisel to himself, u paint a picture that u were never "incomplete" even at the starting point
DIRK: I’m Dirk motherfucking Strider. When they cut me they had to find sharper stuff than diamonds.
DIRK: But just ‘cause my sword’s unbreakable don’t mean it hurts to polish it from time to time.
POP goes more of Dirk’s nodules under Roxy’s palms.
ROXY: homoerotic and true! :D
ROXY: i was always complete too!
ROXY: the reason im givin body neutral is because if im a man then...im a man!!!
ROXY: i dont need to change anything about myself to actualize that fact
ROXY: the fact is just a fact. and when u mix fact w logic then it starts to turn out that boobs+butt is in fact not a girl thing, but a guy thing, bc im a guy...and i have them! BOOM
ROXY: INCREDIBLE GENDER MAGIC PERFORMED BY THE GENDER WIZARD!!!!
DIRK: Man...
DIRK: In a way, I envy you.
ROXY: u wish u kept ur big naturals ?
DIRK: No.
DIRK: When I say all that stuff about being Dirk motherfucking Strider I don’t even know if it’s still true. I’m just regurgitating the attitude I had when I knew what was true.
DIRK: All the pieces of context I once used to verify my beliefs have since drifted into far pockets of space.
DIRK: You, on the other hand, can conjure the truth without the slightest outside validation and still know that it’s true. That is magic. Genuine gender magic coming from the motherfucking gender wizard. I don’t just envy you "in a way". I’m jealous of you in more ways than I can count.
ROXY: dirk..
DIRK: You’re being very validating toward my peculiar gender schema. And while the internal logic of both of our models certainly make a formidable match, I think it’s only fair to acknowledge the actual attitudes with which we put them into play.
DIRK: You express your gender with an air of freedom and happiness, never letting its perceived expectations control you. Meanwhile mine has been typically forged out of shaved bone and sculpted fat in a death struggle against a humiliation from which one never returns.
DIRK: And you could say hey, that’s just where our personalities differ. I’m the kind of guy who feels the need to always be moving the goalpost whereas you threw that nasty old piece of trash out eons ago. But I swear to God my shit is a full time fucking job. And it is tiring. And it is painful.
DIRK: Don’t tell anyone I said this, but if I could just take a short sabbatical from being a man, just two or three days to kick my feet up and I don’t know, recuperate, organize my estate, remove the horrible terrible diseased masses from my body maybe. Nothing fucking major.
ROXY: ...omg i am so sorry it completely slipped my mind to ask when u showed up all fucked up looking
ROXY: are u in pain?????????
DIRK: Excruciatingly so. But no more or less so than when I was beautiful.
ROXY: ohh dirky :(
ROXY: does it hurt when i remove chunks like this?
DIRK: I don’t know. Numbing agents were never particularly effective on me, and at some point I just stopped bothering with them altogether. I’m so adept at tuning out pain that I’ve developed total sensation blindness.
DIRK: Maybe if you remove another mass I can try to focus on what it feels like.
Roxy grips a cylinder of meat sticking out of Dirk’s stomach, limp and dense like a sandbag, and disappears it in his fist.
DIRK: No... It doesn’t hurt there anymore. It feels better.
ROXY: ah jesus i need to get this shit offa u faster
DIRK: Don’t.
DIRK: I’ve felt like this for a thousand years. It’s the experience of gaining some relief that I'd like to draw out.
Roxy is mildly flushed. He focuses on Dirk’s flesh and continues the surgery.
ROXY: if u say so!
ROXY: to me the very best part of bein a man? is bein transgender :)
ROXY: u laying here butt ass naked does kind of make me nostalgic tho
DIRK: For?
ROXY: when i wanted to look like alla dis
DIRK: When you prayed nightly to look like the Elephant Man.
ROXY: when i wanted a dick!!!
ROXY: u changed my WOURLD
ROXY: i could not believe it. you were so cool. if there were ever something u wanted, it was indisputably yours
ROXY: i just found it so utterly masculine and cool...and i was rapt with so much fucking jealously towards u!!! ahh it takes me back
DIRK: Before you woke up and realized that you’d been idolizing a pretentious action figure.
ROXY: dont u see it
ROXY: i walk around w my titties out my hair long i wear all pink and have cute little eyelashes
ROXY: out here in the middle of nowhere 5000 years removed from any semblance of society none of that stuff means jack anything anymore
ROXY: but where we come from it meant everything. and for a long time i was terrified to do any of it because i thought it would make me, in the eyes of some objective beholder, not a real man
ROXY: the reality of being transgender is so insecure. a large portion of your “real self” is outsourced to the eyes that perceive you
ROXY: for your maleness to exist it must be processed through the mind of an entity that can grasp the concept of what a man even is
ROXY: it hurt me not to feel that i was fixed on the “male” side of the scale like you guys were
ROXY: that i was not even fixed at whatever particular point i was at in my “transition”, but from moment to moment i could slide away from male depending on how well i hid my breasts, the contours of my body, my basic proportions
ROXY: the harder i tried to look like a cis guy the more pitifully people looked down on me like some sort of half man
ROXY: to the point where trying to be a man in public gave me just about as much gender dysphoria as being a woman did
ROXY: to never feel the ground was solid beneath me made me want to shrink so deeply inside a nest of binders, hoodies, and baggy pants that nobody would ever see me
Invisible sadness occurs deep inside of Dirk’s face. The thought of Roxy leaving him again causes some ache in his heart.
ROXY: u know how emasculating it was to bind EVERY TIME i had go out to pick up toilet paper just for it not to even rly do anything for the way people saw me
ROXY: i gave up
ROXY: i started going outside in nothin short of my pjs just a loose tanktop and some shortshorts as if to say watch out world im setting off the detrans bomb in t minus 2
ROXY: yanno the shit id wear if i didnt give a shit
ROXY: but the people who knew me still addressed me as “he”
ROXY: thats when i unlocked a new kind of look from people–this total confusion
ROXY: and u know what? being looked at like they had no idea WHAT i was was probably the first time i actually felt gender euphoria in my entire life
ROXY: i just couldnt figure myself out...why...why was that the moment i felt happy? why was that the moment i liked?
ROXY: then for whatever reason, i thought about you
ROXY: and i thought
ROXY: how could i have been calling myself a man that whole time...IF I HADNT BEEN DOING WHATEVER TF I WANTED???????????????
ROXY: when we were kids you invented the type of boy you were going to be be. could i do that too? what if i already had??
Roxy’s hands vacantly move around Dirk as he looks up in blissful reminiscence. The excitement from that time is still as fresh to him as it ever was.
ROXY: at the end of the day when all of the eyes are gone, and there is no one left to see a man when they look at me, the only person left is me
ROXY: im the first and last bastion of who and what i am. this is a type of magic not a god, but only a transgender can perform
DIRK: Heh.
DIRK: Tally that up as just another way I wish I was more like you, or, I guess, the inspirational Dirk living inside of you.
ROXY: u dont have to wish that
ROXY: i stopped worrying so much about literally embodying every type of man i found beautiful when i discovered the next best thing
ROXY: ogling them from afar *smork*
DIRK: Migrating some of the excess matter from your self image into desire for others. The sensual approach.
DIRK: I’ll have to try it sometime.
ROXY: its much more exciting than trying to mold the whole world into copies of urself ^_^ >3>"
DIRK: How did you know I was mindjacking like 7 of our friends as we speak?
ROXY: damn.. my guess was actually 10 or 12
DIRK: Well, for once, I’m actually all here. If I were to multitask right now it would take away from what an unaugmented, normal human man might describe as a "pleasurable experience."
DIRK: Nobody’s been up to anything worth jacking these days anyways. Action has been few and far between.
ROXY: surprised the action man doesnt make it happen
DIRK: I haven’t been so focused on "the action" as of late.
ROXY: no way
ROXY: 5 millennia is finally starting to put a dent in this old dog’s neverchanging ways
DIRK: Oh believe me, this old dog still has teeth. This is my ultradestructive form of rebellion.
ROXY: against?
DIRK: My Ultimate persona is a cabal of just the worst fucking guys. The shittiest dudes. Nobody likes these guys, and they’re all up here.
DIRK: Caliborn has been screaming behind my eyes for God knows how long to destroy the remainder of Earth C so that the conditions of his birth are met. It’s those pesky survivor colonies who just keep holding on, throwing off all the juju or whatever.
DIRK: He also says I look hideous and that I should fix myself before I do it. So that when I massacre all those people it looks cool, and not totally lame.
ROXY: yikes!
ROXY: do u think caliborn is the impetus for u to fix ur ancient necro bod after all these years??
DIRK: Not really. Maybe? I don’t know. As much as this freakish mind soup contributes to me wanting to throw myself into a sputtering supergiant, I guess it also does something to maintain that self preserving ego you mentioned earlier. But I hardly consider that worth it.
Roxy places his hand on his chin. He considers something. He places his hand over Dirk’s forehead and presses down. He raises it with fervor and goes "WHOOSH."
DIRK: What was that?
ROXY: nothin
ROXY: just thought i would try something
DIRK: Oh. Nope. They’re still in there.
ROXY: for you it probably feels like the delineation between the good and the bad parts of your personality is crystal fuckin clear
ROXY: but at the end of the day it’s just you in there
ROXY: and i dont feel any particular want to make you change...meanin i cant
ROXY: srry dirk
DIRK: None taken.
Roxy smiles and pushes into Dirk’s abdomen like a masseuse, popping a mass of small lumps into thin air. Dirk, who has maintained a disciplined silence until now, lets escape a curt sigh.
ROXY: o sorry did that hurt?
DIRK: No.
ROXY: ...
DIRK: ...
...
Dirk tilts his head slightly to look in a mirror at the side of the operating slab.
DIRK: The results of the operation are already looking good. Seems like I came to the right guy.
ROXY: now just wait to say that until uve seen ALL the results
Roxy runs his hand up Dirk’s thigh, feeling underneath sacs of flesh for masses to remove, picking at knobules with his finger and thumb.
ROXY: i dont have the specificman brain it takes to calibrate your shoulder girth to the nanometer or w/e
DIRK: If not, then how are you producing such an accurate restoration of my body?
ROXY: we have known each other a long time ive spent like probably a third of my life staring at u
ROXY: sure i don’t have every detail but the impression of you is seared into my brain and for void that’s enough
DIRK: So all you have to do is tap into what you want me to look like.
Roxy, affecting nothing but cold, medical intent, hovers his hand above a heavy bulb weighing down on Dirk’s groin, then hesitates. There’s tension beneath it. He rests his hand on it with a softer touch than he’d been handling the other masses with.
ROXY: just doing my job sir
DIRK: Tell me, Roxy. What do you want me to look like?
ROXY: i want you to look the way that u wanna look
DIRK: Say I don’t care how I look.
ROXY: comin from you? i dont believe it
ROXY: whadda you even doin here then?
DIRK: I’m seeing you.
DIRK: And after a refreshing bout of jamming I realize something.
DIRK: I really don’t care how I look.
DIRK: That’s what I avoided talking to you for 5000 years for. Because I knew that you’d crack me open and something would change in how I viewed myself. I mean anybody could’ve. At the core of the impenetrable, recursive stratum of Mission Impossible vaults guarding my self image, the actual thing itself is about as resistant as a soap bubble. No, I knew you were the only one I would let do it.
DIRK: And I was always so afraid that would devalue my identity and take away from all the hard work I had done on myself.
DIRK: But it doesn’t. It just means that I don’t care.
DIRK: So say I don’t care how I look. What would you want me to look like?
Roxy sits there for a second, knowing but not believing.
He frees Dirk’s perfect penis from the lump that had been trapping it, allowing it to boldly swing upwards.
ROXY: .................................................................................like a sexy secret cyborg man
Dirk wraps his arms around Roxy, pulling him into a deep kiss on the operating table.
Roxy presses his naked body to Dirk's. He wriggles around on Dirk’s leg like an embarrassing worm, trying to reap what he can of the sensation of his pussy grinding against a wall of bulbous nodes, firm like putty. He hooks his hands inside a thick meat cluster, letting himself get twisted up in Dirk's loose flesh to deepen their kiss further. Dirk pushes the heavy, blunt mound encasing his left arm into the dip of Roxy's back. He traps him in place as he aggressively gnashes down his neck to his chest.
Roxy grips onto Dirk’s bulbs so tightly strings of liquid silicone squirt out; The line between natural and synthetic fluids gets more vague. With his nipples pressed flat against a wall of squishy, wet bulbs, the overload of weird sensations forces loud cries out of Roxy. This fills the void carved out of the room by Dirk’s intense sex silence. Without the need for much conscious coordination on the part of Dirk or Roxy, HIS PENIS slips into HIS VAGINA.
Dirk turns Roxy around and fucks him with the horsepower of some awesome monster machine man. Physically, the sensation in Dirk’s hundred times over replaced penis skin is dull–practically nonexistent. But it doesn’t matter. In his supermind he feels it all. Two massive tumorous rocks obstructing Dirk’s original balls pound against Roxy’s butt and thighs, bruising them up badly. He gropes Roxy’s tit as if to squash it into pulp. If not for Dirk’s disciplined use of force, Roxy would be either torn apart or crushed beneath the grotesque masses.
After Roxy has been ravaged raw to the fullest extent, Dirk concludes the intercourse by cumming.
Dirk holds Roxy in his arms, the monstrous one wrapped sturdily around Roxy’s back.
DIRK: I should’ve been having gay sex with you this whole time. We probably could’ve avoided several global catastrophes in doing so.
What can only be described as semen oozes out of Roxy’s vagina.
ROXY: ah!!
ROXY: what in the wourld...
DIRK: Part of my penile design was to create semi-artificial sperm synthesizing naturally occurring chemicals in my body.
DIRK: Over time my design became so sophisticated that my sperm developed a functioning flagellum and a nucleus capable of delivering my powerful genes to an egg.
ROXY: sir
ROXY: wait a minute
ROXY: WAIT R U SRS
DIRK: No.
ROXY: OH OKAY IM A LITTLE OLD TO BE A FATHER IS ALL
ROXY: but you did program your undercover synthedick to splurt cum
DIRK: Well, yeah. That part is evidently true.
ROXY: you are an ARTISTE
ROXY: yanno i bet you could release the patent to your jizztech to the transgenders of earth c as sort of a hmm peace offering maybe? could go a long way in mending the shitshow
DIRK: Not sure I’m too keen on that.
DIRK: It’s the principle for me. Real men invent their own sperm.
ROXY: okay but do you really think that or is that more bullshit you just said to me rn
DIRK: I’ll think on whether it was or was not, in fact, bullshit.
ROXY: its like i just smashed michelangelo and the hot slab of rock he chiseled the statue of david outta all n one guy
ROXY: aaa!!!
ROXY: omigawd
ROXY (thinking): getting something u stopped dreaming about a long time ago...doesnt feel any less wonderful than you always wished it would!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i feel like a kid again!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :’’’DDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD
Roxy blows stars into space. Far away on planet earth populations are moved by it–if new constellations can form in the sky, then new ways of life can persist on a hostile planet. He falls back smiling.
Afterwards, naked Roxy continues mending Dirk’s visage to his liking
ROXY: u know why i’m doin this
DIRK: Because you wanna fuck me again?
ROXY: ajdjsjfjworowfnJejckSBCDB i have NO PRABLEM FUCKIN YOU MONSTERFUCK MODE OKAY IT EVEN KINDA ADDS S nvm
ROXY: i’m doin this because this is a work of art that you worked v hard on and i appreciate IN AN *OBJECTIVE, ARTISTIC WAY* and id like for it to exist without it causing you constant neverending horrible pain n agony
ROXY: even if you don’t identify with this body anymore it still belongs in the transgender museum of WONDARS!!!
ROXY: you my friend are a work of art
DIRK: Hey. What if you didn’t void out again after this. What if you stayed, and let me take you out?
ROXY: kjfkldasgjd’tkg;’sldgks’sag’dskajdkadlsakjwiq4th3gwd’rt32evdlsagds
ROXY: umm out WHARE we arent allowed back on the planet we made for doing all our mortal-type-activities
DIRK: I’ll make a new one just for you. Crush some stardust into a ball, toss it into the orbit of a juicy lookin’ star and pop a promising species in the evolution microwave ‘til they invent fancy restaurants, the likes of which I will be taking you out to.
ROXY: AHFJADSKDAF HELP
ROXY: ummmmmm okayy i dont have to return to the void by any certain deadline or anything...but wont the whole species evolution thing kinda take several million years or like...?
Roxy peers innocently at Dirk, eager to follow his lead.
DIRK: Nah, not even. Take whatever grand expanse of time you’re imagining and halve that. That’s how long it would take me to make you date-planet if I fucking sucked. Now watch this.